Digital intimacy is about exchange, but what is it that it is made of and how are we exchanging it? A PERSONAL PROJECT is a series of online artifacts ranging from videos and erotic stories to photos and snapchats created to expose power dynamics in online, browser-mediated affairs. Who or what controls who's arousal? Who gets paid? Are there different kinds of currency used for pay-outs? Who gets what kind of currency-- is it all equal? Guilt and shame are explored as a possible substance that can be communicated through interface obfuscated online interaction. This project is formally presented and continuously exhibited in an account on XTUBE, an amateur porn site.
"Power dynamics affected this work not because of the power of the people or the culture inside, but the power of the people and the culture outside looking in. I feel ashamed that I see these spaces as a playground where I get to construct my own fantasies and control my environment. In a lot of ways I am excited about this non-corporal freedom I gain there—like sexually excited. We all want something intangible that we can't have and there's always these fucked up political connotations that are attached to these desires. I use these people online just as much as they're using me and I’m secretly really happily ashamed of that. I use people online because I can't bring myself to do it IRL. See the connections? I think my way of somehow ritualistically absolving myself of this shame is by producing these videos. The product for me is a kind of stain, and I think the footage reflects it—it is all really dark and self-aware in this way."